My second grade teacher noted on a progress report to my parents that "she likes to visit with her neighbors." This was something of a demerit back in the day but 50-something years later, she had me pegged. I loved visiting with my neighbors as a kid and I've never stopped. I'm a social sort, pretty much an open book.
So why have I decided to keep my surgery quiet and not share it with the world?
Believe me, when I opened the letter last weekend and read the news, all I wanted to do was grab the nearest stranger and tell them all about it. I was so excited. I couldn't believe it. Fortunately, people tend to look away when they see someone sitting in the grass with a letter in their hands, tears rolling down their face.
Why the decision?
The marvelous blogs of other bandsters have convinced me ~ it's just in my best interest. I don't need the added pressure of everyone watching me when I eat. It's going to be a big enough adjustment as it is without having the world taking notes on all the changes. So I'm keeping it to myself and a few select people I know I can count on for support.
Much as I hate to say it, I'm also choosing secrecy because of those people who, for whatever reason, do whatever they can to sabotage other people's success. They are out there and sadly, I've found they often bear a strong resemblance to well-meaning relatives and competitive dear friends. I learned this lesson the hard way when one of my dearest, oldest friends went to incredible lengths to sabotage my efforts when I was faithfully following Weight Watchers. Why does a person who loves me do that kind of thing? I realized she truly wasn't aware of what she was doing and how it hurt me. It was all about how badly she felt about herself.
This is all about me. I need to keep it that way. Lord knows I've spent a lifetime taking care of everyone else. This is my secret. And that's ok.
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In my opinion, you are doing the right thing. I can't tell you how happy I am now that I told virtually no one (just one friend, DH and kids, not even my brothers or their wives). If I knew everyone was "watching" me, it would be a huge pressure.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the reality is that many people have VERY negative views about WLS. You don't need that.
I know ploenty of people who "don't tell" when they have a boob job or tummy tuck or whatever - this is no different. Then there are those who tell the world about their PS, and it becomes grist for the rumor mill (ie, Did you see her boob job? It looks so fake!)
It is your business.
You know what, Nessa - you tell who you're comfortable with and no-one else.. for myself, it's my husband and boys, my closest friend and just a couple of others I feel won't judge me or watch me. Just do what feels right :)
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies, just seems like the best idea to keep it to myself. I've learned so much about this from reading blogs and other people's experiences. It's a personal thing and we get to choose who we share it with.
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